The Older I Get!!

The Mint Lounge, Bangalore Edition, a weekly newspaper of the Mint — a business newspaper published from New Delhi had an interesting theme for the First Week of January 2025. It was ‘War and Peace’. It was interesting in that a few authors had been asked to write their interpretation on the theme. I read the stories and thought I too should write my take on the theme.

In that very week, Ernie our dog had an unusual encounter. He has his own room which he shares with the washing machine towards the back of the house, where he has plenty of room to run and play if he so desires. One night at about 10:00pm I felt he was restless, soft whining and pacing with just one bark. And then all was quiet and peaceful. The next morning, life was normal for Ernie and us, till it was time to put clothes into the washing machine. There was a cat / kitten under the washing machine. Ernie, the dog had spent the night with a kitten! There should have been war, but Ernie chose peace. War happened when the humans tried to get the kitten out. Once released, she ran for her life and hopefully was at peace with mother cat and her siblings.

Another incident happened many years ago when we had our first dog, Yoda a German Shepherd. One morning, I heard a huge commotion on the terrace. I went up to find out what was happening. Yoda followed me. There were 4 adult crows trying to motivate a baby crow to fly. In a split second, Yoda declared war with the crows — I added to the commotion by shouting at Yoda to stop it. Within minutes there was a murder (collective noun for crows) of about 40 crows on the neighbouring building roof and ledge, cawing and all ready to fire a volley of bullets. Fortunately, better sense prevailed and Yoda declared a cease fire and descended the staircase. We quickly locked the door. I went up 10 minutes later and all was peaceful. Not a single crow — not even the baby crow.

It was about the same week that the song, ‘The Older I get’ by Alan Jackson popped up on my phone. I heard it a couple of times and thought that it would be a good idea to look at War and Peace in the context of growing old.

There also seemed to be a conspiracy of sorts because all of a sudden there seemed to be a number of articles on old age and preparing for the same. One such article, commenced with a quote by Ernest Hemingway which said, “The hardest lesson I’ve had to learn as an adult is the relentless need to keep going, no matter how shattered I feel inside.”

All war with no sign of peace. By the time this is posted, I would have had my 74th birthday and Hubby would be 80. I really wish I had been better prepared for the wars. My body is constantly reminding me that I am old and growing older by the day.

I would love to dance and run, or at least walk briskly but my bones are creaking and my muscles are weakening, I would really, really like to laugh heartily with tears of happiness running down my cheeks. I can’t do that as I fear that my bladder will leak and leave a pool under my chair. Eyesight could be dimming for many, it did for me too but I opted for multifocal lens for the cataract surgery. I often have to tell hubby not to talk so loudly, but he probably thinks all around him have difficulty in hearing like he does. Plenty could also be happening on the inside especially the heart, the lungs in fact all organs.

The Greeks and the Romans said, ‘A sound mind in a sound body.’ Hence the body has to be sound for the mind to be sound. However, the body and the mind often seem to be at war with each other. Physical difficulties can rob one of one’s freedom and independence to up and go and do what one wants to do.

There are so many other wars:

Mental wars we fight with ourselves and others. Technology wars, Financial wars, Relationship wars, Spiritual wars, Education wars and many more that I have missed out on or not encountered in my life.

Let’s have a look at History. Every war that has been fought and is being fought has been and is futile — some gain but more loss. Loss of lives, torture, pain, separation, imprisonment all leading up to trauma. Destruction of home and hearth, property and loss of jobs.

War can at best be a strategic tool — it can never be the answer.

Taking a note from history, we learn that the wars we fight in our personal lives are just as futile. The war within can be as taxing as any external battle. They destroy peace and come in the way of getting us ready to face old age and death.

We therefore have to strive and work towards peace. Peace in our lives, peace in death. I am going to reiterate what has been said over and over again. This is for everyone, whatever age one is — Preparation for peaceful old age has to start early.

Peace is to be healthy in body and mind.

So, exercise. Better to start early, however it is never too late to start. Remember, activity heals. Keep moving with whatever helps the body. Choose your exercise.

Foodie or not, we need to eat healthy food in moderation.

Sleep — I personally find that when I do not sleep well, I am tired and tend to get irritable which could be the beginning of a war.

Peace is coming to terms with technology an all-pervading feature of our lives.

Peace is being financially independent and stable.

Peace is meeting with family and friends. However, forget not that love is not possessive, love is not controlling. Love is growing in freedom. Freedom to go on with your life, just as you let your children and grandchildren get on with their lives. Enjoy them and celebrate them.

Peace is forgiveness.

Peace is confrontation to clear the air.

Peace is being kind and generous without any expectations.

Indira Gandhi — Ex Prime Minister of India said, “People with clenched fists cannot shake hands.” (I am not sure if she practiced what she preached.)

Peace is gratitude. Those with a positive mindset, have lesser stress, enjoy better sleep and enjoy a sense of well-being. Choose to be grateful.

Peace is making a smooth transition between what you were and what you have become.

Peace is also getting ready to just be who you are — no titles, no designations, no power.

“Peace is its own reward.” Mahatma Gandhi

Peace is accepting the fact that life has a unique way of ending the wars and that is a peaceful death.

Death should be the closing chapter of a life lived to the fullest with every breath, with every heartbeat.

The older I get

The longer I pray

I don’t know why, I guess that I’ve

Got more to say

And the older I get

The more thankful I feel

For the life I’ve had, and all the life I’m living still.

(Verse-3 from the song ‘The Older I Get’.)

Death should be a culmination of a life lived with purpose, touching lives and souls of people we encountered on our journey.